Epistle To Colonel De Peyster

EpistleToColonelDePeyster

Myhonor'dColonel,deepIfeel

YourinterestinthePoet'sweal;

Ah!nowsma'hearthaeItospeel

ThesteepParnassus,

Surroundedthusbyboluspill,

Andpotionglasses.

Owhatacantyworldwereit,

Wouldpainandcareandsicknessspareit;

AndFortunefavourworthandmerit

Astheydeserve;

Andayerowtho'roast-beefandclaret,

Syne,whawadstarve?

DameLife,tho'fictionoutmaytrickher,

Andinpastegemsandfripperydeckher;

Oh!flickering,feeble,andunsicker

I'vefoundherstill,

Ayewaveringlikethewillow-wicker,

'Tweengoodandill.

Thenthatcurstcarmagnole,auldSatan,

Watcheslikebaudronsbyaratton

Oursinfu'saultogetaclauton,

Wi'felonire;

Syne,whip!histailye'llne'ercastsauton,

He'safflikefire.

AhNick!ahNick!itisnafair,

Firstshowingusthetemptingware,

Brightwines,andbonielassesrare,

Toputusdaft

Syneweave,unseen,thyspidersnare

Ohell'sdamnedwaft.

PoorMan,theflie,aftbizzesby,

Andaft,aschancehecomestheenigh,

Thydamn'dauldelbowyeukswi'joy

Andhellishpleasure!

Alreadyinthyfancy'seye,

Thysickertreasure.

Soon,heelso'ergowdie,inhegangs,

And,likeasheep-headonatangs,

Thygirninglaughenjoyshispangs,

Andmurderingwrestle,

As,danglinginthewind,hehangs,

Agibbet'stassel.

ButlestyouthinkIamuncivil

Toplagueyouwiththisdrauntingdrivel,

Abjuringa'intentionsevil,

Iquatmypen,

TheLordpreserveusfraethedevil!

Amen!Amen!